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Hello, and welcome to EffiJesus!

This website was inspired by my recent research into Jesus and his activities for a philosphy project I had to do (I got a D). Here is my research summary:

-Jesus was born in a pub
-Jesus' dad was some kind of dictator
-Jesus' pretend dad made toilet seats
-If you say Jesus in front of the mirror in the bogs in The Queen's Head in Swindon three times, he will magically appears before you and give you a blowjob for five dollar
-Jesus is an anagram of Sejus, Lord of Fire
-Jesus made miracles happen with his magical breath mints
-Some people worship Jesus as a deity
-Jesus has a third nipple
-Charles Dickens wrote Jesus' biography in the book 'Imbibe All'
-Jesus has superpowers, so don't fuck him off or he'll ram a brick through your neck
-Jesus is high in fibre and low in calories

This site is brought to you by Krunk, creator of www.chrisrock.bravehost.com

Comments to twinberettas@hotmail.com

THE JESUS SIMULATOR

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Krunk's Jesus Flakes

Ninja Pirate Jesus Debut
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JESUS' MIRACLE BLOOPERS: PREVIOUSLY UNSEEN FOOTAGE

Miracle Blooper One
Miracle Blooper Two
Miracle Blooper Three
Miracle Blooper Four
Miracle Blooper Five
Miracle Blooper Six
Miracle Blooper Seven
Miracle Blooper Eight
Miracle Blooper Nine